two dreams

first dream:

was at my dad and my stepmum's. they'd bought me an old four square dairy which was damn cool, but they were also wanting to sell their house and needed me to do stuff to it, like rearrange the furniture and replace the tiles in the bathroom which had become super sodden and felt like sponges. I however, have no idea of how to tile, and was also on my way to go and do other things, and i got mad at them, because I knew I'd asked previously if they wanted my help with the house and they'd said no so I had committed to other things, and now there was no way I could put them at my number one priority and I felt furious that they'd try and make me help out and in doing so, let down other people I'd agreed to help.

I yelled at dad and realised my little sister was in the room and looked frightened of me so I told her it was all right, I was just angry at dad, turned to him and finished my rant then went to find a bathroom to cool myself down in. Came out of the bathroom, and saw sacha standing in the doorway (was also her room) she saw me and looked terrified and screamed and ran away - I felt really guilty and ashamed for yelling at dad in front of her and making her scared of me.

dream two:

i'd been in korea with the intention of teaching english, somehow i'd lost my passport, but still had a drivers license and a passport photo in my wallet which seemed to be doing me all right. Came back to New Zealand, I think it was meant to be for christmas or some crap. Found myself walking up george street holding a mannequin with my clothes on it. Thought, this is bollocks, stopped in a second hand store to take my shite off the dummy and then give the dummy to the store. Turned out Vicki worked there and she insisted I come to Leilana's mum's house for Lei's birthday party.

Lei's mum's house is out where cherry farm used to be, and it is massive. In the dream, it was really opulent for the most part - paintings on all the walls and stupidly thick carpet. Lei showed me her room which was like a huge old hotel suite with a courtyard garden growing in the room.

We went into another room where a whole lot of guests were. they had cigarettes in cigarette holders only half of them were smoking joints instead of tobacco. we were in a circle and the smoke was passed around. i kept taking drags, one time I smoked the whole lot in one inhale and felt embarrassed for being greedy, but it hadn't felt like much. A couple of times I'd be talking and not realise I had one in my hands. Once, I had my eyes closed and opened them, seeing that I had a joint and puffed quickly before passing on. I was struggling to stay awake, feeling jet lagged and seedy. The house had gotten dark and I struggled to see things from this point onwards.

I went into the bathroom to freshen up, splash some water on my face. I tried to turn on the lights but they were all out. It was a bathroom with a number of stalls in it, and I managed to turn on a light in one of those. The bathroom was disgusting when it was illuminated - broken toilets seats, flooded stalls, toilet paper everywhere and mildew up the walls. I'd put my bag down and I could now see that it was directly under a broken pipe and had filled my bag with water.

I left the bathroom and went to empty my bag out in leilana's courtyard bedroom.

jump in memory... there were a whole lot of other rooms at the back of the house that were being used to store stuff. It was like being in a department store, only nothing had price tags on it, there was no staff, and no security. People started to steal stuff. I saw one girl snatch a bag and confronted her about it, she sneered and tried to get past me, I smacked her in the face with my sodden bag and then dragged her by her hair towards the party. I was really mad because Lei and her family are awesome, and stealing from a person is never right, especially when they've let you into their house in a spirit of trust and friendship. Being envious of possessions doesn't give you the right to take them.

The stealing intensified and I found myself chasing mobs and gangs of theives instead of individuals. mostly they were masked. I caught up to one group as they were taking their masks off and saw maria and raff and got really upset and explained to them why what they were doing was so shit. they agreed and put back all the stuff they'd nicked, looking very contrite, and helped me round up the other thieves.

in my dream last night i made friends with this boy. we both seemed to be about 13 or 14. he was a little odd, turns out he was from a highly religious family who were only in town for a wee while and were struggling to find the place they were meant to be staying at because they didn't like to use cellphones or the internet and didn't understand the technology at all. when the mum needed to use the phone, she called the operator to get connected, even though the number for the house was on a pamphlet in front of her.

I remember driving with them to get to the lodge they were staying at. I think I was acting as somewhat guide. not sure how I got in their mega van, was obvious they didn't like me much. driving along super fast (whenever i'm in a car, it's always someone else driving and they're always stupidly out of control - nothing different in this dream) and sometimes careening off the road, driving along in the ditch. everyone in the family seemed totally accustomed to this kind of driving. i was crapping my pants.

spent a good amount of time hanging out with the boy, felt like we were super close buddies, also felt like he didn't really get his family much.

had a confrontation with the kids of the family, i had to get a bag of stuff from their house they were staying at, and they had tipped it everywhere. i was picking it all up when they encircled me and told me to go away, to stop corrupting their brother. they were really menacing, i just wanted to get my stuff and get out. one of the girls kicked me hard in the back. i flipped out, grabbed her hair (also seems to be a theme in my dreams, is me retaliating to violence by hair pulling...) and then left.

wandered around in the dusk sobbing to myself and trying to find my friend to tell him to go home, and that i wouldn't be hanging out with him any more. finally found him, he could tell i was really upset but i wouldn't tell him why - just told him to call his family and go home. he seemed really sad, but did as i asked and left.

Last night I dreamt that I was in Billy Eliot the stage show. But aswell as it being a show, it was also a class. I had missed the first class, so I didn't know as much as everyone else, but somehow I still got the lead role. So I get on the stage and everyone had a wee board made from wood or sandpaper to tap dance on, but since I was the lead role, mine was lifted up by chains like a swing, except I was standing on it, and I still had to tap dance. Since I was one class behind, I didn't know the measurements of the trapeze thing and stuff, it was a bit weird and scary.
After the performance/rehearsal, we went into a little room that may have been kind of like the bus that comes around with harold the giraffe in it. I remember the people there were the same people from my music paper, and the teacher may have been Lisa Warrington. There was some sort of debrief and then I went to get the book for the paper so I wasn't so behind, because once i knew the measurements I thought the trapeze flying tap dancing board wouldn't be so scary.
I got the book from a librarian who was very concerned about the state of my feet and kept trying to give me pills for it.

In another part of my dream, Jen and I had a weekend off or something so we casually decided to go for a trip around Europe. Then we decided that on the way there we would do a quick stopover at the gold coast or fiji or somewhere, so we went to buy dresses for the warmer climate. We went to amazon and got flowery short dresses, and it was my job to wash them. I went home and put on a load of dishes in the dishwasher, but forgot to put the dresses in there with them so I put the dresses in the freezer instead.

Although I remember heaps of details about these dreams, I still have a strange feeling that I have forgotten something, or that something in the dream meant a whole lot more to me that I'm giving it credit for.

Olympic Nightmare

DJ and I have flown to Hong Kong for the Olympics and we've arrived and they're got the first heat, and it's a swimming heat and we're inside the airport hotel lobby but somehow it's also the swimming pool and DJ's gone out to look at the view. There are a mass of people pressed against the window looking at the view so he walks out into the middle of the pool along a divider, which is all very well and good, but there's a race about to start. So he comes back over and we start watching this race and as we're watching, one of the guys accidentally jumps in too early and it's a false start. It's really stinking hot inside, and so DJ jumps into the pool, I suppose because he thinks he's got time to jump in and get out in time before they restart.

I feel jealous that he's in the water, and reproachful because I know he shouldn't be doing it.

I'm also really worried about it because people are talking to one another like "what's he doing, why is he in the pool?!" and I'm feeling embarrassed.

DJ's taking ages and ages to get out of the pool, but no-one fishes him out, everyone just waits, more or less in silence, and I'm the only one urging him to get out of the pool. Finally he does, and we watch the race.

After the race, everyone starts to leave and in the crush of it, we get pushed over to the side and an official approaches us (who looks like Ed Woods (I think)) and says to DJ and me, "I want you out now" and I say "but we've just arrived from New Zealand and I don't know why he jumped in, but we're really sorry if it upset you" and he yells at me "I DON'T CARE! YOU CAN'T BEHAVE LIKE THAT AND EXPECT TO GET AWAY WITH IT" and I start sobbing and begging him to reconsider because otherwise we've come all this way for nothing.

DJ just stands off to the side watching me crying.