Monday, March 2, 2009

24th Feb: Kitty.

Radio One office: a grey cat dragging its right rear leg as it crosses the floor. Mitch explains that it’s because it used to be super fat and when it lost weight its bodily mechanics couldn’t keep up and parts of its body had to shut down. The cat also has a bizarre expression plastered on its face the whole time, a la “I’m a caaaaat, HUNGH”. Someone takes a photo of Mitch in mid-speech and by coincidence his expression is almost identical to that of the cat, when he sees the photo he finds it hysterical and laughs uncontrollably for a lengthy time. Hope says: “that’s fucking radical!”

I am ripping cabbage (or silverbeet) and placing it in big stacks which I wash, fairly precariously, under a too pressurized tap.

Luci and Yeshe hanging over a balcony railing. In Paris?

In the willowbank dairy all sitting on the floor. Old style slushy machine captures my attention.

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Dream Snippets

Dream snippets:

I was applying for something and the application process had three components, two of which escape me, but the third was drawing a three legged kitten. Mine was grey. I spent so long on this that I ran out of time to complete the other two sections and had a minor freak-out.

We were all piled into a big red van. Well, into it, on top of it, hanging out the windows etc. I was perched on the front right of the bonnet and we were heading for some kind of sixties music festival: driving down a road lined with beautiful hippy kids all lolling around while they waited to go in. There was a fair bit of careering round corners and near misses. Basically this is all very camp a low hum-esque - all the van's occupants were friends who had been there and the overloaded vehicle is clearly a reference to the terrifying golf buggy ride that I took late on the last night. In dreamland, though, I wasn't scared just practical about the fact that if we went much further to the right I was going to end up shmooshed against the side of a steep grassy bank.

Early Saturday morning after waking up and falling back asleep: My dream started off as a replica of the events that had occurred before I fell asleep - getting into bed with all my clothes on, talking to April and Simon who came in to visit me, and telling Dom not to turn the light off because I'd never be able to get up and go back to my own house, then falling asleep as soon as he switched it off anyway. A rapid acceleration of time and I'm waking up and realising that I'm still wearing my boots (which I also did in real life). Then it splits: where in reality I took my boots off and went back to sleep (and this dream began) in dreamland I get up and proceed with activities which, infuriatingly, I can't remember.

Last night: we were supposed to be having a party on a boat but when we got there it was just a wooden frame that looked neither boatlike nor waterproof. In fact, excessively UN-waterproof as it was simply a few planks attached at cross angles rising from the water. I was a little miffed, but the water was warmish so things just mosied on. Ended up in a dinghy and Dan Nagels pashed Brigit who was wearing a big black bow in her hair.

Thursday, February 19, 2009


My friend thomas and also Jen (not jen aitken) both died. I was away in melbourne, but i could go back for the funeral. Both funerals were on at the same time, so I could only pick one. Jen's mum had put up posters advertising her funeral kind of like you would advertise a tacky show, there was glitter and a big picture of her face.


I was working at the fitz, and they had just changed the way they take a customers order. I had to put every detail of what the wanted in a comprehensive booklet. I didn't really know how to do it, so I was slow and the cafe was busy. I ended up just writing orders on my arm, intending to put them in the booklets when I had spare moment. It kept being busy, so I never filled in the booklets and no one got there food.

Then I was in Alexandra, and my cv was printed on bread and hung up all over town.

theatre group

I was in some sort of theatre group with Kitty. We got stoned and tried to make stuff up. We had meetings with Tee to help us. Then we were in the centre of town or a mall and ashton kutcher was there selling hot dogs from a cart. My high school principal was there having a meeting which somehow related to our theatre group, but when they saw us they moved their meeting to the top story of a purple theatre restaurant building, but we could look up and see them through the window.


14th feb

I was up high on a skyscraper hanging from a cable. It felt like I was part of a competition, but I didn't have to really do anything. There was lots of advertising on big screens. I think I lasted the longest up there, so I may have won the competition, but it wasn't a good feeling. It felt like I had lost someone.

at the crib

10th feb.

I was at my family's crib alone. I was very mature. Helen, my cousin drives into the front yard and I tell her that it is ok for her to stay. She tells me she is there for the funeral. I didn't know about the funeral but I presume it's for a family member. I didn't find out who. we were both old, but looked the same except bigger. We were grown up but hadn't shown signs of aging.


8th feb

there was a litter of very very young kittens. They were just opening their eyes

save squad

7th febuary

Jen and I were part of some sort of squad that saved people, it had a harry potter feeling about it, we wore robes like them. Ben was in the squad too, although he didn't come back from the last mission so jen and I went back out to find him. We were rowing or swimming somewhere, and we saw the death boat pass us. The death boat was a ghostly figure alone in a single rowing boat. It was obviously a sign of death, because both Jen and I then understood that Ben had died. Admitting our failure we returned, only to find that Ben was alive and had saved himself. Everyone said that the three of us were the best squad.

group of authors

30 january

I was part of a group of people who were starting to jointly write a book that was similar or followed on from the Harry Potter books. I was worried about getting all the facts right about the harry potter series, and also about not copying them too much. I wanted to do more reasearch before starting, but the others just wanted to write the book quickly

hip peircings

29 january

I was somewhere with a group of friend and we came across a stall thing that was giving people hip peircings, they put a metal bar through the skin on each hip. We all thought we would get one, but as I sat down to be peirced, everyone else chickened out. I was worried about the pain, so shaun put bongela on my hips. I was all ready to be put through a lot of pain, but I didn't feel a thing. After they had peirced me I realised that they had put a bar all the way from my ears to my hips on both sides. I wasn't too fussed because I thought that would be more versatile, and that I could wear different variations each day. The peircing people then told me that it was against the religion/tradition to ever take the bars out so I had to wear them like that forever.

snake and wedding

27 january

there was a black and white snake littered throughout my dream. It was appearing everywhere, in stories I was telling people, in a lake, in notes and in warnings. The more the snake appeared, the more I felt that there was a link or a meaning to it that I was about to discover.

I was going to a wedding, but only a few guests were there when I showed up, not the bridal party or anything. It was just a small group of people in a room, kind of like a waiting room. Some food was brought out, although there wasn't as much food as we thought there would be. the main or important people never came.

Although the wedding was a different dream to the snake, I still remember telling people about the snake when I was mingling at the wedding.


I was at a therapist or a shrink lying on a couch looking up and I was just teetering on spilling out all my problems to them, when I notice Jen and danish Caroline are spying on me through the skylight above my head. I remember feeling very annoyed.

pizza party and spooky hill

22nd january

I was at a concert, something like the big day out maybe, except it was on a hill top thing, and wasn't very big and there was no real stage, just a lot of people milling around and walking places. I remember the sky being big and grey and ominous feeling. I was with my mum and one of my cousins. I don't know why we were there or what we were doing.

I was also at a pizza party kind of restaurant thing. All the pizza was nailed to or hung on the wall and if you wanted some you had to wait for a guy ( maybe a waiter type) to cut some pizza down off the wall and give some to your table. He got to choose when and how much you ate.

Monday, January 26, 2009

Things to Ponder...

I am conscious of the fact that we are drawing ever-closer to our rehearsal period and therefore I think it would be a good idea if we utilised our blog to do some pre-rehearsal preparation.  What I would like you to do is have a look over your own dreams and see if you can seek out connections or similar themes that may or may not be running through them.  Post any findings on the blog and we can discuss them when we meet up in Feb.

Sunday, January 25, 2009

All sorts

I dreamt I was pregnant again and I was hanging out with a group of people outdoors, possibly some sort of commune.  I could fly but not very far off the ground.  I remember being obsessed with finding out whether my baby was a boy or girl and I kept asking people their opinion by showing them my belly and seeing what they thought.  Then my dream changed so no longer pregnant but now living in a flat with some others, we were getting new windows which was causing great excitement because they were designed by a famous artist.  I also remember being in a classroom at one point and learning about this artist and how amazing he was.  I also remember dreaming of sky skrapers and apartment buildings at one point during this dream.  I'm also noticing that now I have been recording my dreams for a while i'm starting to remember them in their non-linear format and my brain has stopped trying to piece them together into one story.  I can also remember specifics more rather than just a brief outline.I'm thinking that maybe you have to train your brain in order to remember your dreams properly, what do you guys think?

Thursday, January 22, 2009


Last night Kate Schrader slept in my room on a mattress on the floor and I dreamt that this was exactly the case except the room we were sleeping in wasn't actually my room, except it was (you know how it goes) and when we woke up she lifted up her mattress and there were hundreds of cockroaches under it, some as big as my hand. Then I realized I was covered in them and lifted up my sheets and they were ALL over me. We brushed them off and went out to the kitchen and I yelled at my mum to clean them up (odd since we were in Australia), I never saw my mum in the dream and never went back into the bedroom but I know she cleaned them up.
We saw Louise in the kitchen and she told us she had come in while we were asleep and slept there too, waking up before we did she noticed the cockroaches and left. She did not wake us to tell us about the bugs, for this I was very angry at her.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Wars and manicures

Last night i was a member of some sort of guerilla army that was attacking the enemy in some kind of desserted mansion.  We fought them for ages and the more we injured them the more they stopped looking like humans and started looking like robotic machines (kind of like the terminators when you blast their skin off.)  Eventually there were only three of us left and we were trying to call for a helicoptor to come and pick us up, unfortunately the robot/humans could pick up cellular waves and were coming after us but the helicoptor swooped down in the nick of time and carried us to safety.  This dream morphed into another one where i was working in some kind of ultra girly mall type thing that had clothes shops and hairdressers and also a manicure place.  My job was to push peoples cuticles back using this purple goopy stuff and an ice block stick.  The funny thing was that while i was doing people's nails i was thinking about the war kind of like it happened in my dream self's past life.

Monday, January 19, 2009

Last night I dreamt i was put in charge of looking after these three dolphins, they belonged to my Standard 4 Primary School teacher Mrs Kilpatrick. She came back to check on the dolphins because she was really worried they wouldn't like me, or the disruption to their care, but this was not the case. The dolphins and I got on really well and they loved having me as their carer.


I've just woken up.  My alarm was set for 7:30am but i turned it off and ended up drifting back to sleep for about 10 minutes.  Had this weird dream that i was cleaning out our rabbit when i decided to pick it up and hold it like a baby.  When i looked down there was a cute little baby in my arms instead of a rabbit.  It was wearing a pink and red jumpsuit and i was on my way over to put it in a high chair.  

p.s. I have a couple of dreams from when i was on holiday that i will post as soon as i get a chance.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Jen 14/01/09

Ok, so, I have been umm-ing and ah-ing about whether to Blog this one, but I decided to do so because it is a great example of how convincing dreams can be and how powerfully they can alter your feelings and comprehension of the 'real' world.
This dream requires a small amount of background story about my life... Well my best friend, Anna, drowned when I was 17, after just returning to the country from a year in Brazil, it is almost the 3 year anniversary of her death.
Dream: I dreamt I was walking somewhere, with Ben Blakely (who doesn't fit at all in the time of this dream because I didn't know him when any of the people or places in the dream were in my life, yet, i digress...) I was walking away from the house I grew up in (which my mum sold recently), walking down the street and around the corner. I saw, on the other side of the road, walking up the hill dragging a big suitcase, a girl who looked a lot like Anna, but knew it couldn't be her because it was soon to be the 1 year anniversary of her death.
The girl looked at me and started running across the street to me, when she got to me it turned out it was in fact Anna! She had a very elaborate story about how she met someone at Auckland airport on her return flight from Brazil, and this person encouraged her to become an undercover, highly secret cop in Guatamala for a year to try and uncover a massive illegal crime ring (or whatever you call them).
She said the NZ Government foiled her death because it was that important to the national safety of the country. To prove her story she showed me her secret ID in which was her sitting on a Vespa totally dressed in pink, this was, by far, enough proof for me, because I was so happy to have my Anna back.
The whole time this was happening Ben was standing beside me watching.
In the dream I was filled the most amazing happiness and a feeling that I was floating, I felt so lucky and just so unbelievably stoked to have Anna back.
Then I woke up: Now here's the most interesting part, I have had maybe 3 dreams like this since she died and on waking I am always completely heartbroken that I only dreamt she was back with me and I know instantly that it isn't true and I am filled with the constant feeling of missing her that is always present.
However in this case, I knew in my brain that I had only dreamt these events, but in my heart I was still convinced that she was back, waiting for me in NZ. I knew that at some point in the day my heart would catch up with my brain and the longer that took to happen the harder it would be. But blissfully, completely unaware my heart continued to fill me with happiness and peace all day long, until approximately 9pm that night the happiness faded away, and once again I realised she was definately not here, she wasn't waiting for me and I truely would never see her again.
Now I'm sure you can see why I pondered so long over whether to blog this or not, and I Hope I made the right decision.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Kitty: Friday 9nd of January.

No dreams last night: I was up till four in the morning because I had made the most unfortunate mistake of downing a large cup of coffee around 10.30pm and when I did finally drift off the exhaustion was enough to block out any night-time thoughts.

The night before the night before last though: I am in this sweet house - almost treehouse-esque. Lots of tucked away staircases and shelves snaking up walls. And somebody's getting married. And it's Aaron Hawkins. I think. Or possibly Louis. And his groom-to-be is a lovely young man who I can't place. We're carrying things around trying to set-up for the reception. Pretty much all I can remember.

The night after that: I'm at art school, first year by the look of things. The class has been assigned to create pieces which follow specific lines; you choose an animal and then a number which to you is affiliated with it. Repeat this with, I think, a body part and then another object which I can't now figure out. I've been ill or on holiday or something and I haven't completed mine, which is fine the lecturer has told me, but everyone else has already hung theirs in an exhibition. One girl has clearly paid a lot of money to have her pictures printed onto heavy duty cardboard which has cerated folds and all sorts of tricksy things and I get super mad because I think it's a cop out and that you shouldn't be allowed to spend that much because it gives you an unfair advantage. For some reason I have a sleeping bag and I curl up on the floor in the gallery space in a sort of protest sit-in. The dream sums itself up with the girl maybe having got her father to get her art printed for free because he works at a printery and me coming up with an idea for my piece which is actually going to cost a bit. Hypocrite. The idea is to tell a story with little objects along the lines of those activity book riddles, e.g.: a car then a picture of a dog then a fire = carpet burn. These will be displayed on a glass topped wooden box with lighting in it so that everything is illuminated.

Sunday, January 4, 2009

two dreams

first dream:

was at my dad and my stepmum's. they'd bought me an old four square dairy which was damn cool, but they were also wanting to sell their house and needed me to do stuff to it, like rearrange the furniture and replace the tiles in the bathroom which had become super sodden and felt like sponges. I however, have no idea of how to tile, and was also on my way to go and do other things, and i got mad at them, because I knew I'd asked previously if they wanted my help with the house and they'd said no so I had committed to other things, and now there was no way I could put them at my number one priority and I felt furious that they'd try and make me help out and in doing so, let down other people I'd agreed to help.

I yelled at dad and realised my little sister was in the room and looked frightened of me so I told her it was all right, I was just angry at dad, turned to him and finished my rant then went to find a bathroom to cool myself down in. Came out of the bathroom, and saw sacha standing in the doorway (was also her room) she saw me and looked terrified and screamed and ran away - I felt really guilty and ashamed for yelling at dad in front of her and making her scared of me.

dream two:

i'd been in korea with the intention of teaching english, somehow i'd lost my passport, but still had a drivers license and a passport photo in my wallet which seemed to be doing me all right. Came back to New Zealand, I think it was meant to be for christmas or some crap. Found myself walking up george street holding a mannequin with my clothes on it. Thought, this is bollocks, stopped in a second hand store to take my shite off the dummy and then give the dummy to the store. Turned out Vicki worked there and she insisted I come to Leilana's mum's house for Lei's birthday party.

Lei's mum's house is out where cherry farm used to be, and it is massive. In the dream, it was really opulent for the most part - paintings on all the walls and stupidly thick carpet. Lei showed me her room which was like a huge old hotel suite with a courtyard garden growing in the room.

We went into another room where a whole lot of guests were. they had cigarettes in cigarette holders only half of them were smoking joints instead of tobacco. we were in a circle and the smoke was passed around. i kept taking drags, one time I smoked the whole lot in one inhale and felt embarrassed for being greedy, but it hadn't felt like much. A couple of times I'd be talking and not realise I had one in my hands. Once, I had my eyes closed and opened them, seeing that I had a joint and puffed quickly before passing on. I was struggling to stay awake, feeling jet lagged and seedy. The house had gotten dark and I struggled to see things from this point onwards.

I went into the bathroom to freshen up, splash some water on my face. I tried to turn on the lights but they were all out. It was a bathroom with a number of stalls in it, and I managed to turn on a light in one of those. The bathroom was disgusting when it was illuminated - broken toilets seats, flooded stalls, toilet paper everywhere and mildew up the walls. I'd put my bag down and I could now see that it was directly under a broken pipe and had filled my bag with water.

I left the bathroom and went to empty my bag out in leilana's courtyard bedroom.

jump in memory... there were a whole lot of other rooms at the back of the house that were being used to store stuff. It was like being in a department store, only nothing had price tags on it, there was no staff, and no security. People started to steal stuff. I saw one girl snatch a bag and confronted her about it, she sneered and tried to get past me, I smacked her in the face with my sodden bag and then dragged her by her hair towards the party. I was really mad because Lei and her family are awesome, and stealing from a person is never right, especially when they've let you into their house in a spirit of trust and friendship. Being envious of possessions doesn't give you the right to take them.

The stealing intensified and I found myself chasing mobs and gangs of theives instead of individuals. mostly they were masked. I caught up to one group as they were taking their masks off and saw maria and raff and got really upset and explained to them why what they were doing was so shit. they agreed and put back all the stuff they'd nicked, looking very contrite, and helped me round up the other thieves.

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Kitty: Friday 2nd of January.

Ok, I've been out of internet connection and not actually dreaming that much so I don't have a lot to report (although there are some scraps of paper with scrawled dream notes floating around my different New Zealand bedrooms so I'll have to do some retrospective posting when I get home).
Last night I won so much money on scratchies. I'm pretty sure that my mother had given them to each of us for Christmas. Big A4 sheets with six different games on them. I won TWICE! It was so exciting. Well, actually I was more like: "oh, oh ok, aw yeah, that's cool, oh yeah that's really cool, um, yeah, no ok. So what happens here? Oh. Good." I was scratching away in this beautiful little bookshop which my brother co-owned (somewhere on George street between the Octagon and Moray place). This is actually about all I can remember but I had this funny hungover-esque feeling - probably an extension of my whole new year's day.

A few details from a dream a couple of night's ago: we were breaking into a house, something about revenge a little. We cut the house in half with a very sharp knife and entered through the clean-cut slit. Our clothes had also been slit down the front and a person on the street yelled at us for being whorish.